Friday, May 21, 2004

"I love the sound of my own voice", or, "Somewhere I have a point, right?"

Greetings again, bored Friday people. I have some riveting news to report, concerning VH1's 50 Most Awesomely Bad Songs Ever (their words, not mine) list.

More often then not when I go down the list, I was a little put out by the choices listed. Huey Lewis' "Heart of Rock and Roll" may be tiresome and 80's to some, but it is a good song and definitely not #10 (adding insult is that it edged out "Rico Suave"!). Watching the show itself lent a little insight into the decision process. The commentators were obscure comedians (I should put that in quotes) or VH1 staff that weren't particularly insightful or explanatory as to their choices.

In particular, there was one egghead who they kept referencing for what must be the basis for all opinions on the show. I have no idea who he was, but my guess is his name is Andrew Hershberger. Not because this name is on my list of usual suspects, but for the singularly confusing opinion/rant piece posted this week on Cinescape. Andy's (we are on a first name basis) piece doesn't so much as break down the show or give any kind of insight as provide a forum for this kid's ageist blathering:
    I was watching VH1 the other day and they had one of those "worst songs of all time" shows on and by the end when such abominations as "Everybody Have Fun Tonight," "Achy Breaky Heart," and "We Built This City" reared their ugly head and won the coveted top spots I realized this list is made by 30-year-olds. Crusty, pungent, has-been 30-year-olds... Who, besides geriatrics, remembers listening to "The Heart of Rock & Roll" or "The Final Countdown" when they had the immediacy of a contemporary offering?
I'd agree with Andy that those songs hardly merit inclusion on the list, but his logic seems to be that old music (i.e., from [aghast] 20 years ago) should be relegated to a meat locker somewhere. He then goes on to comment on the inclusion of recent songs:
    Out of fifty songs, nine were from this decade alone. Out of 10,000 years of music composition nine of the worst sonic atrocities have been made in the last five years.
His viewpoint seems to veer somewhere between outrage that 80's songs are even listed and recent songs have been included. Huh? Of course, Andy should know that there are very few bands worth shit out there (that didn't exist before 1996), and if his own generation's music has been dragged through 15 miles of shit (so there!). However, he also seems a little upset that 'old' pop music has been stealing the thunder of VH1. What exactly is his complaint? Alas, the world may never know. Possibly that his education (assuming facts not in evidence) did not include a class on essay writing.